Lost time

Sat in front of the piano for almost the entire day today continuing to learn Minuet in G and simplified Fur Elise. And tried Hanon exercise 1 and finding information about ABRSM piano exams to see how far am I from a grade 1. (And I have to say, very far.)

I came across some child prodigies videos while looking for a video of Minuet in G and came to realise how amazing these kids are and how I'm totally not. The way they control their little hands to play a piece so out of what 5 year olds are supposed to be doing. It's amazing really.

The fact that I'm about to be 17 and I'm just starting to learn piano (by myself) while these kids might become famous pianists before they even come close to 17. There's so much time lost right there I sometimes feel sorry for myself. I know I shouldn't be because there are people out there who can't even dare to dream about playing piano because they are trapped by circumstances.

You know, I've always believed there's this musical thing in me. I can learn tunes fairly quickly and I can usually tell if someone sings out of tune lol. But that's beside the point. If not for all the time lost maybe I could be on par with all my friends & classmates who are currently grade 7 or 8. 

That's so much more effort I have to put in to barely make it through to the second step (after the first step of getting a piano) and to make up for the lost time. That's a whole lot of learning and exercises and practices and theory I'm trying to concentrate into the shortest amount of time possible.

The black and white road with tau-gays as obstacles is difficult...... but I shall persevere. *flexes arm and clenches fist*

我要 一步一步 往上爬……

Too fast

Dearest Jasmine is going to upgrade to an actual upright piano and she's selling me her Clavinova at a friendly price. And it's probably going to be delivered on Wednesday. Yes I repeat, WEDNESDAY.

I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to clear my room and make space for a digital piano 137cm in length. Gosh. I've been putting this off since who-knows-how-long and now I am slightly flustered by this sudden knowledge that I'm getting a piano. Very flustered actually.

There're always periods of time I get very excited about learning piano (for example last year after Os) but then I eventually put it off due to a very messy room, lack of lobangs or just not that persistent about the whole thing. I lack perseverance anyway.

Gotta start youtubing and perhaps borrowing some dummy's guide to piano...

Anyway CNY is in a week's time and other than the festive goodies, nothing much about it appeals to me. I'm not trying to be a stereotypical teenager who plugs in her earphones during gatherings but really, I find these activities pointless at times. Of course it's good to be able to get-together over food but the rest, no.

It is supposed to be a season of happiness and prosperity but when your parents are fretting over how much ang bao money to give to your cousins (just so that they will not be at the losing end or be judged) and how they're taking your ang bao money to repackage it for your 同辈 relatives, you realise it becomes more than that. CNY becomes a platform to boast their children's excellent academic results, their family wealth and their own supposed happiness and prosperity.

I was watching the second half of the Sheng Siong Show and 龙飘飘 (I think), this old-school CNY singer, was singing this CNY song that I have never heard of but according to my mum was pretty famous at that time. Then it chanced upon me that almost all CNY songs are about 钱钱钱 and 发财. It's disgusting how this season of family get-togethers might turn out to be just fervent hoping for more wealth and lottery strikes.

For this, I'd give my usual "Urghghggghgh".